He was under the couch cushions the whole time!

I loved Dennis Miller back in the '80s, before he made his heel turn into a right-wing douche. In retrospect, I realize I actually just liked the SNL writers coupled with his snarky delivery.

GAM?

That wouldn’t stop Gary Oldman!

I think Musk is actually fairly unusual in his degree of cluelessness about that. You don’t really ever see billionaires getting onstage with popular comedians so they can be booed like Musk did with Dave Chapelle. The super-wealthy generally know to keep a low profile and surround themselves with armed guards.

It’s straight hopium. There’s no way they give that much of a shit about any state supreme court race.

If Gary Oldman can play a little person, why can’t Val Kilmer play a halfling?

Excuse me - I was speaking as if I were Trump.

They just have to say that as long as you haven’t served two consecutive terms you’re still eligible.

Ronald Reagan had full-blown Alzheimer’s disease through his entire second term and yet Republicans kept control of the White House through 1992. Dementia is no obstacle when the guy at the top is a show pony anyway.

“There are, there are methods which you could do it, as you know,”

“There are, there are methods by which you could shoot someone on Fifth Avenue and get away with it scott free, as you know.” In fact I don’t know.

Remember when they had Stephen Colbert roast GW during the dinner? That was peak comedy.

The best part is that they only invited Colbert because they didn’t realize his character on The Colbert Report was a parody of right-wing pundits.

Admit it but say it isn’t a big deal, but also deny that it ever happened. Let your followers pick whichever version they prefer. Profit!

Bend It (Reality) Like Beckham

“Leopards can eat people’s faces, even in the US?”

Well, I was WFH at the time and they didn’t give me anything to do so it was effectively that anyway. And really they had given me almost no work to do for the four months prior to that - which of course is why I was not even the least bit surprised by the layoff. My severance was to the penny exactly what I would have gotten from unemployment, so it effectively meant I got unemployment benefits without having to pretend to look for work. Also, they randomly sent me a check for $6K that I have no idea what for (not PTO or sick time compensation) and I used it to buy a school bus. So overall I can’t really hate them too much. Years later I found out my mother had thought I was working for Sysco (the food supply conglomerate) instead of Cisco.

I worked briefly for Cisco because they acquired my company (a much smaller competitor) to help eliminate competition. The only good thing I can say about them is they gave me (and everybody else from this smaller company) two months’ notice of the layoff and didn’t have us escorted out of the building or anything.

“… so we can be sure to avoid ever actually implementing them.”

Damn, I wish I’d thought of that back then.

I used to be a mobile developer (mainly Windows CE, Android and iOS) but once in 2010 I got put onto a project producing a TV-guide-like app for Blackberry. I was absolutely blown away by how fucking awful the developer tools were. Even during the development phase, an app had to be fully signed before it could be deployed to a device and tested and the signing servers were almost always down or operating under a severe delay. Even worse was that the framework code was divided up into umpteen billion different modules, each of which had to be separately signed, so the more modules you made use of the longer your app took to be signed (I often found myself writing custom functions that should logically have been handled by the framework, just to avoid the inclusion of one more module). Some days, even a one-line change to your code took 30 to 40 minutes to get onto your device - or else it was impossible because the signing servers were completely down. They did have emulators but they were worse than the physical devices and everything still had to be signed anyway. I just got in the habit of making hours of changes and then deploying while I went to lunch and testing everything afterwards; definitely not a programming best practice but the only way to make it work.

The built-in UI tools were horrible and there wasn’t anything that could be used for a TV guide, so I ended up having to do literally everything with Graphics primitives - although that was actually the fun part of the project. The most annoying thing was the 16-bit graphics, which probably made a bit of sense in 2003 but certainly not in 2010. And of course Blackberry was crashing and dying at that point anyway, so my work was pretty much useless.

The scroll wheel was awesome, though. It allowed for a super-precise UI controlling aspect that just isn’t possible with touchscreens.